She stood up on the balcony waiting for him. She was surrounded by a view so lovely and awe inspiring she found her eyes occasionally misting. She saw sail boats moving lazily on the silken blueness with a dazzling halo of light surrounding them. She saw a long winding bridge, almost like a finger, pointing its direction to the island. She was taken back by the warm fragrant air that inspired her nostrils to take in deep breaths… eager for more even before they had a chance to exhale. Paradise… it was her private paradise… this place he had taken her to and yes, left her…

They had arrived late on Friday… The expectation of spending some time with him, drew her week into an endless array of hours and minutes that took their time in passing. She found herself earning to be his, each and every moment. To be able to hold him in her arms and not have to let him go, until morning that is. She chided herself that she should, at this time be use to those words he spoke… like a repeat performance, but his performance lasting the span of 15 years. A repeating of words, that each time wrung her emotions and sent her into a stage of despair… Despair on so many different levels… despair of loosing him and perhaps, never seeing him again. And the deeper, more penetrating despair… the despair of knowing she hated herself. She hated her every molecule that put her body and mind together… She hated herself for what she had and planned to continue doing. She had spent 15 years, which included some of the best years of her life… with…

The words… the repeated words… “I got to go”. “Yes, I know… “ “I am sorry but I got to go”. Their loving lasted only an hour or two… sometimes three on those days he could spare more. His loving was unlike anyone else’s… she had compared him with all the other single men in her life, and they all fell short.