The sun went down. Lenore crawled from her shallow grave, listless and hungry. At the same time, Baron Latos rose from the coffin in his castle crypt, driven from the dreamless sleep of death by a most unholy craving. And, on the other side of town, Daniel got out of bed, went to the kitchen, and mixed himself a smoothie out of pig’s blood and cherry Kool-Aid. (Because drinking blood straight gave him gas).

Lenore wore the ragged cerements of the grave, smeared with dirt. She crept along on all fours, hiding in dark alleys and behind hedgerows, skulking and stalking. Baron Latos wore his finest tailored suit and most expensive black cape. He called his inhuman servants to prepare the carriage and horses, as he was going out to mingle with unsuspecting mortals. Daniel put on sweats and an old Invader Zim t-shirt with a bloodstain on the sleeve and sat down to watch the Futurama marathon on channel three.

His phone rang. It was Jenna. “Hi, honey!” he said.

“Where are you?”

“I just got up,” he said, taking a swig of cherry-flavored blood. “Are you coming over?”

“You’re supposed to be taking me to Lianne’s party tonight! It’s Halloween and I want everyone to see that I’m dating a vamp-iiiiire! They’ll all be super jealous.”

“I’m not sure I’m comfortable with that.”

Jenna made a little “Uck!” noise. “Just get over here and put on your costume.”

“What costume?”

“You vampire costume!”

“But I’m a vampire already?”

“But I want everyone to be able to tell.”

She hung up.

***

Lenore followed the sound of music and people. The streets were crowded and she couldn’t drag away a victim without being seen, but perhaps this house full of people and strange noises would afford an opportunity. She slipped in the bedroom window. An unsuspecting mortal was sleeping here. In the dark, she followed his scent. As she came closer the smell grew stronger. She bared her fangs. The smell was—

Terrible.

The drunk man rolled over and belched, scratching his hairy belly. Lenore moved on. Even she had standards.

Latos arrived on foot because the police kept pulling his carriage over for obstructing traffic. He followed two delicious-looking girls for a few blocks and saw that they were going to the two-story house on the corner, the one alive with lights and music and conversation. He chuckled at the young people in their Halloween costumes. “Ah, mortals,” he said, running a gloved hand along his black goatee, “how foolishly they embrace the trappings of death, never realizing how close they really are to the true and final touch of—

“Wait, are they playing Chris Brown? Really? That’s so inappropriate…”

He waited at the door for 20 minutes trying to find the correct person to invite him in. Finally he settled on following the pizza guy in, on the grounds that getting permission from someone with permission was probably good enough.

Daniel arrived in his girlfriend’s Hyundai. She led him in by the hand, but he tried to linger by the door. “I don’t want to do this,” he said.

“You look fine.”

“Why did you have to put all this heavy white makeup on me?”

“You need to look pale and dramatic.”

“I look like an anemic mime.”

“You could pull the look off if you tried. Bare your fangs.”

“I don’t have fangs.”

“Then bare your dental work. That bridge is pretty scary.”

Daniel did his best. He looked like he was perpetually just about to sneeze. Jenna was dressed as a cat, and she flicked her tail as she appraised him. “You’re doing it wrong. Try smoldering.”

“What’s smoldering?”

“It’s a kind of glower. Only sexy. It’s a vampire thing.”

“I don’t think it is. If it was, I’d be doing it.”

“Oh come on!” she said, dragging him inside.

Lenore sat on the stairs. She was confused. She picked grave mold from under her ragged fingernails while assessing the nearest partiers.