The Empress Theatre Club, in Stockport Cheshire, was built in what had earlier been a cinema albeit extensively modified. At one end was a stage, a slightly convex affair about a metre and half above the auditorium. The seating area consisted of tables and chairs and extended to a depth of some ten metres from the podium. That area also extended to both sides of the stage such that it was possible to be seated almost in line with the curved front. A curtain arrangement lay at the back of it and provided space for a small quartet. Overall the stage was spacious, well lit and afforded everyone in the audience an excellent view. It was in such surroundings that I had the first view, in my hitherto sheltered life, of a naked woman.

By the standards of today what took place was no big deal. These days I am apt to lament that striptease as skill has all but disappeared. However, it was in places like the Empress, given unlimited space to move, that the art of burlesque could be practised to its full effect and the lady who was going to
demonstrate that art, the subject of this article, was called Toni Collins.

Swaggering on to the stage, the pleated skirt of her blue and white checkered dress swung to and fro in synchronism with the movement of her hips. From my perspective a pair of long, stiletto, high-heeled shoes seemed to glide across the platform and out of which extended a pair of perfect legs visible as far as the knees. The dress was very feminine and fitted tightly around her curving waist before covering both bust and shoulders in a formal manner. Her thin. long neck lead to a head adorned with short, blond, almost crewcut hairstyle. Overall, the effect was very Dutch with only clogs needed to replace the authority of those stilettos.


Since that day I have contemplated many times the difference between strippers who can and cannot carry off a gig. I have concluded that, in essence, there are two ingredients. A lot depends on their face. Irrespective of their bodies, girls who engage eyeball contact, girls who pout, but above all girls who smile are the girls who succeed where others fail.