Thus I had constructed upon my estate, at great cost, a magnificent folly, patterned on the Temple of Aphrodite, where I could practice the arts of pleasure. Beneath the mound where it stands I had chambers excavated to my precise design wherein I could explore my desires without intrusion or observation. These chambers being well appointed, luxuriously furnished and fully equipped to allow my pursuit of what others coyly name vice. I disdain the cowardice of these people and tolerate no limit, imposed by myself or any other, upon my activities.

Since boyhood I have been blessed with a prodigious fertility, and a prodigious appetite to accompany it. My loins have always been most excessively fruitful and I did sprout forth like a veritable fountain day upon day before even a fit age. The manifestations in my tights were a constant source of embarrassment to my parents when in company. In my youth I impregnated a dozen reluctant serving maids to the annoyance of my father, who found them expensive to silence and difficult to replace. In the end it was to tavern whores he resorted in employing a brace of harlots as my constant companions. It was they who taught me a plenitude of things I could scarcely imagine at such a tender age. They also taught me the employment of a sheep’s intestine to prevent their impregnation, though I now do detest the things and refuse to allow any retention of my germinal essence. For it is in the way of all nature that the buck, the ram, the bull and the stallion broadcast their seed as far and as wide as they be able. This is the proper order with which we tamper to our peril. In my circumstances I am able to broadcast well far. I am satisfied to say I have sired many litters of unwanted bastards.

For me the Grand Tour was an exploration of the sexual mores and practices of many nations. Indeed I did sample extensively of the bordellos, brothels and bawdy houses of Europe and Asia Minor. I learnt of many practices and perversions with which to whet my appetite in the bedroom and the dungeon. It was at this time I discovered a predilection for inflicting suffering on the female. It is true that I did not return with all the souvenirs of my contemporary travellers but did bring home a dose of the pox.