Up in a small town in Nothern California sits a young, handsome,
hard working handyman — let’s call him Mr. Tool. He has made the
decision the automate his paperwork, mostly because he hates doing
it, and anything he can do to get out of having to write it out
would be welcome. What programs??? What hardware?? What
software???

Well, this smart guy figures he will pick the brains of the AOL
people — somebody out there knows something, and maybe will work
out a deal for him……. Sure enough, he runs into this
consultant one evening — Ms. Mercenary, and he begins to plead his
case. No budget, no idea of what he wants, you know the story.
This guy just wants to be out there in the field working, and not
spending his life at a computer. A date is set, and our guy starts
to wonder when the consultant insists on a time when Mr. Tool will
not be disturbed by anyone for several hours. She stresses he is
paying for this service, and it is only fair to him to have
dedicated time — no wife, kids, or animals to break the
concentration, let alone phones or pagers.

The appointed time rolls around, and Mr. Tool is very nervous —
the house is clean, kids are out for the entire day, wife is at
work until well into the evening hours. Everything is in place.
Suddenly, the doorbell rings. Mr. Tool’s heart jumps — this
could be it…….

It is….. Ms. Mercenary proves to be a stacked midget — big,
suckable tits, soft dark hair, and a mischievious glint in her dark
brown eyes. She opens her mouth to speak, and this velvety deep
voice pours out, “Pleased to meet you, Mr. Tool. Now, which way is
the office?” She seems to be all business.