The story below is told by a close female friend:

I am currently traveling throughout Europe by myself. Traveling alone has given me lots of time to think, to remember things, to develop courage and to overcome fear. Fear comes in waves. When I am all dressed up and ready to walk out into that big world, I stop and wish I were staying home. It always happens. I force myself to reach deep down and pull out some courage. The courage isn’t really there. It’s just a good front that I present. People think I’m so strong. but that’s a mistake. Here is an example:

My lover was a businessman who did business all over the world, but especially Asia, and specifically China. He was on the road for weeks at a time, and during his many absences I missed him badly. During one of his many times away from home, my mind started contriving a plan to juice up our love life.

Could I fit in a box? It was his birthday soon but a business trip was planned and he was going to be in Las Vegas. Do I dare surprise him in such a decadent place? Just for self-assurance (insurance?) I reserved an open return ticket. The abundance of call girls in Las Vegas allows men to diverge from their home lives. Was I sure about my lover’s habits? My return ticket gave me some courage to continue with my plan.