Naruto:The lemon games chapter 1:Tsuname_(0)

Naruto was silently resting on the couch at
Tazuna’s house, in the dead of the night. He had
his own room because Tazuna had his own room,
Tsunami and Sakura were sharing a room, Inari
had his own room, and Kakashi and Sasuke were
sharing a room. It was just after the battle for the
bridge in fact. A huge party would be thrown
tomorrow
He was resting until a large book appeared out of
nowhere and dropped…right on his groin.
“Sonofabitch!” Naruto shouted rolling onto the
floor and smacking his head into it by accident.
Whoever said that having a second pain dulls the
first was a fucking moron.
In his pain ridden mind, Naruto had a few
thoughts, one of the least was ‘Why isn’t anyone
coming down?’
Thinking it to be a prank pulled by that Inari kid,
Naruto slowly sat up and picked the rather heavy
book up. “By the Log, this thing weighs a good
twenty pounds. Is there a way to make it
smaller?” as soon as Naruto said those words the
book shrank in his hand, which made him blink. It
was now the size of a paperback novel.
It was even addressed to him strangely enough.
On the front in big bold letters were the words ‘TO
NARUTO UZUMAKI, READ ME!’ Naruto looked the
book over, turning it looking for a summary or a
title of the book, but it didn’t have anything past
that writing.
“I hate reading.” Naruto said but opened the
front page where words began to write
themselves.
‘To Naruto Uzumaki, if you are reading this then
my aim was true and you have been stuck in a
video game. If you’re not Naruto Uzumaki then
you should be reduced to ash by the end of this
sentence. Naruto, I have placed you within a
video game of my own design that, hopefully,
doesn’t have any glitches. There will be a few
inconsistencies that YOU know of, but everyone
else will think of as natural. The point of this video
game is simple. Level up and become the
strongest ninja known. However, unlike normal
video games, you won’t be leveling up through
combat and learning multiple Jutsu, instead you’ll
be leveling up by having sex with various women
and learning Jutsu that will help you have sex
with the women.’
“WHAT!” Naruto shouted before looking around.
Sakura wouldn’t like it if he would be doing this.
‘At this point you have lively shouted and are
wondering where your precious ‘Sakura-chan’ is
in case she heard your shouts. The second the
book hit the targeted owner, it cast a quick
silencing seal around you so that you can hear
yourself, but no one else can until you are
finished reading. It also boosted your libido or
sexual drive so that you will notice other women.
A flat-chested howler monkey fan girl won’t even
level you up if you were at level one, which you’re
not. Turn the page.’
“Bossy ass book.” Naruto said turning the page
and then recoiling his hand as he got a rather
deep paper cut but he finished turning the page.
On the left hand page was writing, and on the
right hand side was a bunch of stats. He started
to read.
‘Yes I, and by the extent of me the book, am
bossy. Deal with it. I know all, see all, and hear all.
So learn some manners before I change what the
Kyuubi gave you between your legs to the size of
a cashew.’
Naruto whimpered putting one hand between his
legs. While he wasn’t sure if he was big or not, he
knew a cashew was not.
‘Now that that’s cleared up, welcome to the Stats
page. Strength, speed, intelligence, endurance,
acrobatics, chakra levels, chakra control, and
luck. These are all numerical values that pertain
to you. If we were to put your chakra levels on
say…Kakashi’s scale, then the numbers would be
much higher, or lower, depending on the
circumstances. Strength is the physical strength
of your body, the higher it is the harder you hit.
Speed is the physical speed of your body; the
higher it is the faster you move. Intelligence isn’t
how much stuff you know, but rather how well
you use what you know. Make sure to learn more
as your intelligence gets higher or else you’ll be
sorely limited. Endurance is how long your
strength and speed last, low strength but high
endurance means you can win against someone
with high strength but low endurance.
Endurance is also how long you can go in the
bed, even having multiple orgasms. Acrobatics is
how high you can jump, how much you can
bend, and a whole slew of other things. Chakra
levels are blatantly obvious. However, as you also
increase your intelligence; your chakra levels will
go up some as well. Having a Bijuu stuck inside
your gut however, your chakra levels are already
damned impressive. Chakra control is again
blatantly obvious .Luck affects everything. From
how well you gamble, to what will show up on
missions, luck will also slightly deal with how
women handle you. If the woman is a frigid bitch,
then a high luck might warm her up to you.
Every level, you will get five stat points outside of
the ten you start with. You can also increase
these stats by learning and training.’
Naruto looked to the stats. Strength was at a 25
he guessed that was good, but he wasn’t sure
what the numbers were out of. Speed was at a
30, Intelligence was at 10, Endurance was a solid
40, Acrobatics was at 20, Chakra levels was at 40,
and he wasn’t surprised to see his Chakra control
at 15. Luck was at 25.
‘The limits of all the stats are at 200. You can
train your stats, to an extent, and boost them.
Every level however you can boost a stat up five
points. The higher the level, the longer it will take
to level up. Turn the page.’
Naruto kept a snide comment to himself and
turned the page where there was a list of skills.
‘These are your skills kid. Kunai throwing,
shuriken throwing, trap making, etc. Some of the
skills are going to be sexual; my recommendation
is to boost your Sexual Aura skill up when you get
the chance. How many points you get for these,
are determined by your intelligence. As of right
now, you get your intelligence x 1, plus the level
you’re currently at. There are enough stats to
keep you going for a very long time. The cap on
each skill is 200. Turn the Page.’
Naruto turned the page, and then turned another
seeing the next page was a list of even more
skills. There had to be at least two hundred skills.
The new page had him, chibified, standing on top
of a blue bar with a zero at one end and a one at
the other.
‘Welcome to your progress page kid. This is how
far you are into the level. Certain actions will fill
this bar. Having sex, and learning Jutsu that can
help you in sex are great ways to fill this bar.
Now, let’s see…’
Naruto stared at the words on the page as the
bar emptied.
‘Don’t worry kid; I just reset it so you can see
what achievements you’ve gotten so far to see
what they do.’
Naruto stared as above the bar the words
‘CONGRATULATIONS!