Jude and Connor: the kiss Chapter 2

JUDES POV

I hung up after that. I couldn’t talk any more, the tears that
suffocated and humiliated me wouldn’t allow it. I couldn’t sleep either.
I couldn’t stop thinking about Connor. Why can’t I stop thinking about
Connor? His perfectly swept hair, his musky yet brilliant scent, his
plaid shirt collection all manifested in my mind. Time slips away and
it’s only till the sun peaks it head that I notice the time. “Oh no” I
think as I remember school in the morning. And my first period is
science. With Connor as my partner. Usually it was my favourite lesson
but after last nights chat it could and probably would be awkward. I get
up early and go about my daily routine: shower, deodorant, clothes,
teeth. I head out the door to walk to school, shouting goodbyes to Stef
and Lena. As I stroll into school premisses, I notice Daria sat on the
school bench with her head in her hands, obviously upset. I was about to
check she was okay when I was intercepted by Taylor.

“What happened?!” I ask sincerely.

“Connor broke up with her this morning. He gave no warning, just dumped
her on the spot” she says and a smile creeps on my face because I think
I know why he did it. “You know break ups are usually a sad time. But I
guess you have a reason to be happy” she was obviously hinting at something.

“What’s that meant to mean?” I sat worriedly

“Well yesterday I was going round Daria’s in the afternoon and decided
to take a quick detour through the forest” my smile slowly Retreated
while I realised what she may have seen. “I was very surprised to see a
very… Intimate scene between you and Connor!”

“Taylor you can’t tell anyone! No one can know!” I say with upmost urgency

“Okay okay” she replies defensively. “Do you like him?” Her voice
changed to more a more serious tone.

“No, I don’t like him lik-“

“If you lie I’ll tell Daria what I saw…” She says interrupting me

“Okay, fine I like him, but you can’t tell anyone!”

“I better go check on Daria” she says before winking “and watch out, you
never know who’s watching in public spaces! Kinda like now!” She leaves
and I turn to go to science. I am face to face with Connor.

CONNORS POV

Jude’s words cut me deep. Mainly because I knew they were all true. What
we were doing was wrong, even though I didn’t like Daria like that
didn’t mean I could string her along. I spent all night thinking,
contemplating what to do, how to fix this with Jude because I was sure
about one thing. I am not losing him now. Both of us have suffered
enough, I just want to be happy. I remember all that time ago when Jude
told me he “didn’t want to be anybody’s secret” and that’s exactly what
he had become and that wasn’t fair. I want to treat him right, if he
gave me a chance I would treat him right but I had to earn that. And it
would begin with breaking up with Daria. I know nothing more could
happen whilst I’m still with her. But how should I tell her? Will she be
upset? Will she hate me? Although she could be… Weird at times I did
like Daria as a friend, she’s one of those reliable people that you
could always count on. I drift off thinking about how to tell her and
enjoy a good nights sleep.

The piercing sound of his alarm clock made me wake with a start. I knew
what I had to do today and I was dreading it. I got out of bed,
showered, got changed and then did my teeth. When I was ready to leave,
I didn’t even bother saying goodbye to my dad, I was too anxious about
my conversation with my soon to be ex. When I got to school, Daria was
waiting for me on the bench in our usual spot. She called out to me and
waved me over. I awkwardly shuffled over to her, stalling for as long as
I could.

“Hey you!” She says with a smile. Probably the last time I’d be seeing
it for a while so I took it in.

“Hey, listen we need to talk” one of the most cliché lines but I just
wanted this to be over.

“Okay…” She replied, a slight hint of worry in her voice.

“I.. Don’t think we should see each other anymore” her mouth expanded
into a wide O shape. I felt awful. I kept my eyes to the floor afraid to
make eye contact. I could hear her start to cry and I wanted to hug her.
To tell her everything will be okay but in all honesty I could say that.
If there is one thing I have learned nothing is certain. Before Jude I
never even looked at another guy in that way but look at me now. If that
isn’t proof that nothing is solid, then I don’t know what is.

“Connor… Why?” She says softly, the overflowing emotion obviously was
too much to even turn to anger. Her sobs becoming closer together.

“Because Daria I’m lying to myself and I’m lying to you every time I see
you. And I can’t keep doing that. It’s not fair to either one of us. But
I want you to know that I do love you… just not like that. I really
hope we can still be friends though!” I reach to touch her but she yanks
her body back.

“No Connor! Stop it! You’re telling me you’ve just been using me this
whole time? That you never had any feelings for me and you want to be
friends?! You know what? You were an awful boyfriend anyways! You were
lazy, you were cheap and worst of all… You’re the worst kisser I have
EVER met. Just leave me alone!” She sobbed into her hands and naturally
Taylor came sprinting over.

“I think you should go” she says sternly. Without a sound I stand up and
go to the other side of the grass just out of sight of the girls. 5
minutes later I see Jude talking to Taylor. Shit. What she’s telling
him? Is she telling him about him and Daria? I have to find out. I
approach Jude from behind. Taylor sees me and shoots me Death Stares.
She makes a quick exit and Jude turns, almost walking straight into me.

“You broke up with Daria?” He said, slightly concerned and inquisitive.

“Yeah. If we are going to continue and see what’s between us, I don’t
want anything getting in the way.