All I could think about was how hot it was today and just how cold it was yesterday; the heavy winds that had blown my Walmart bag across the parking lot as my friends had giggled at my pursuit had turned to intense rays beating down on my sixteen year old body. I’ll be honest, it was a body most of my friends- even the older ones- envied and it was in part because of my body that the older girls even hung out with me anyways. My innocent face and long blond hair complimented my 34B chest and slender 5”6 frame to the point where most people knew I was younger than all my friends but didn’t bother to say anything about it. I even stole looks from my best friend Paige- the head cheerleader of our high school- when we walked through the mall that day before; she hadn’t really cared though, with her boyfriend Zach she was the happiest girl in the world. Now I know what you’re thinking but Zach isn’t the quarterback or the center or the team captain of anything; he is however the best actor in our drama school’s drama department and the dashing star of more than just my dreams. Sometimes when the night was cold but the covers were too hot, I’d pull them back, let the cold air chill my skin, close my eyes and let those thoughts of Zach warm my body…and my hands. Sooner or later I’d drift off to sleep, satisfied and fulfilled; glad to get my secret lusts out of my system and free of any shame when I’d come face to face with Paige the next day. I mean they were just thoughts, they weren’t anything to feel bad about and they were things I just couldn’t control; it had to be someone for everyone and for me it was Zach. I’d never told Paige but I didn’t think she’d care to be perfectly honest; she had him, I didn’t and I think she’s always known a little. One time I spent the night at her place while a couple of the other girls were over and they started to drink; I didn’t really want to at first but they convinced me to have a couple coolers and since I liked the taste I didn’t see the harm. Finally while I was feeling pretty woozy I asked Paige what Zach was like in bed; she’d looked at me with this devilish, knowing smile and leaned forward to whisper in my ear.

“Jay, you have no idea.”

And she was right; she’d meant it nicely- using her special nickname for me, my name’s actually Jade and everyone but Paige seems to think it’s short enough the way it is- but she was right, I had no idea what Zach was like, in fact I had no idea what any man was like. I wasn’t like the rest of my friends, they’d jumped right into teenage sexuality head-first, even the ones my age and a little younger but I’d always wanted to hold off. Not just with men either but by myself; I’d only really “discovered” masterbation a few weeks ago when Paige so elegantly complained me “That fucking bastard came too soon, so I had to get myself off!”. With one innocent question about what she meant I’d not only unleashed a fit of giggles but an eye- and mouth- opening experience . Even after that taste of the sexual wonders that awaited me, I was perfectly content “taking care of myself” and being patient until the right man came along. Which wasn’t to say that I didn’t have plenty of opportunities; my physical appearance left plenty of guys thinking they could take a ride on “easy street” but no matter what they tried to tell me I knew what they were after. It also didn’t hurt that Paige had either slept with or knew someone that had slept with most of them. Zach and Paige had fixed me up on a double date with his friend Cam one time, a real cute musician that Zach had met working on a rock musical outside school but it hadn’t gone so well. Don’t get me wrong, Cam was a dream come true for any other girl and he told me so on a number of occasions. Yeah he was arrogant and cocky and thought I should feel honored to for him to want me but he had every right to be, he was kindof a local hero; everyone knew him and yes, everyone wanted him. Everyone but me. And I told him so; not outright though, I was too hypnotized by his deep blue eyes to do so- as I said…he was a dream- but when we got alone and every sentence out of my mouth involved Zach, well lets just say Cam was smarter than he looked. One observant boy that Cam and to his credit he was nice enough to promise to keep my secret; he was even gentlemen enough to kiss me on the cheek after he walked me home, telling me Zach, or any guy would be lucky to have me. He was so nice in fact that I completely ignored the fact that when I turned around to walk into my house his eyes were completely glued to my ass- I even walked slower for his benefit. In the end Cam turned out to be a nice, sensitive guy, everything I was looking for..but he wasn’t Zach. And besides, I liked being alone.

That’s why when Paige had called the night before and asked what my plans were the next day, I’d turned down her offer to drive me to the pool. I don’t know why she’d even bothered to call and ask, she knew exactly where I was going; the same place I always went on a Sunday morning, no matter what the weather. Some people choose Sundays to go and worship in church and I did too but my church wasn’t lined with crucifixes and pews, it was covered in water and whether rain, sleet or snow I was always there to worship, like the postmen of swimming. I’d been going to the indoor swimming pool in town since I was a little girl taking lessons and since the second I took to water like a fish I knew that it would always be a part of my life. I’d given everything I had to swimming and loved every second of it; the refreshing wave that overcame your body as it was submerged in the water, becoming one with the element of life. It pushed me to succeed, to surpass everything I’d already done and to improve and it had sculpted me into the young woman that I was today. A lot of people had helped me along that path; my parents, my older brother Jeffrey, my teachers, my coaches and perhaps the most influential of all of them was the pool’s Janitor, Mr Fontane. He’d worked there as long as I could remember and when I was younger he started to always bring me a treat from the concession stand in the pools lobby. As I got older the treats still continued- he liked to treat me like his daughter, no matter how old I got- and one day I was honestly shocked when he came to me, wrapped in a towel and still dripping wet, empty handed. I’d expected some sort of apology like

“Sorry hun, was all out of change.”

But instead he reached down, grabbed my hand and slid something into it; something hard and cold. He’d clenched my hand tight with a curious squeeze and whispered in my ear

“Our secret, okay?”

I’d nodded unsure of what was happening and then opened my hand to see something I recognized immediately; the key to the building. I knew it right away without question, it was the exact same key I’d seen him pull from his ring to open up when he’d found me sitting outside waiting week after week, backback next to me as I curled up with a book against the side of the building.