Alright, how much time’s left?…Three and a half hours. Sure. Just half an hour passes after five hours of looking away from it. Fan-fucking-tastic. Ok, you know what? Not that bad. That’s 60 minutes three times and then one half. Each of those 60 minutes is just…uh…15? Yeah, 15 minutes 4 times. And 15 minutes is just 3 minutes 5 times. So in all actuality, I’m waiting 3 minutes…70 times and then my shift’s completely over. And I think one of those three minutes passed just thinking about that. So 69 more to go…heh. Oh, the joys of being bored as all hell. At least one good thing came from school. I can now add a bit of flair to counting down the minutes. Totally worth the 7 hours every day for half my life.

My internal calculations are interrupted by a loud thud on the conveyor belt, shocking me to my core. Once I recover from my jolt, I look in front of me to see the source of the noise. To my dismay, it’s someone I’m quite acquainted with, Mason. Oh, goody. As if my day needed more hell to endure. Whatever. Just need to scan his shit and he’ll leave me alone. As a matter of fact, he might just ignore me completely. He’s looking on his phone.

“Taiga?” he questions in an exaggerated tone, “Little gayby Taiga? Is that actually you?”

Fuck.

“Oh my God, I didn’t notice you here. How are you?”

“Sir, I’d thank you to refrain from calling me that,” I respond, scanning and bagging his things,

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to make you all fussy. You want me to find you a guy to give you your pacifier?”

I ignore his taunting, scanning and bagging faster to get him out of my fucking face.

“What, this is what counts for customer service around here?” he continues, “You’re not gonna ask how my day’s going, if I found everything to my liking, or even ask if there’s anything you can do to better my experience? I thought you would jump at the opportunity to service your customers.”

All I can do is sigh and shake my head at his remarks. I reeeeeally need this job, so I just gotta let this slide. Plus, I’m almost done. Just gotta scan and bag these last five items and I’m home free. He’ll be gone and I won’t have any more threats of being fired.

“Come on, Taiga. Surely, you wanna do everything in your power to brighten my day. What, are you reserving your services for your boss? You saving your special assets for better job opportunities? I bet you are. I bet you like how hard they pull on your little tail while they give you your ‘promotions’. I bet when you heard of the different ‘positions’, you just couldn’t wa-”

“Ok, your total comes out to be $45.65. Will that be cash or card?” I interrupt, internally begging for all of this to be over.

He gives me a smug smirk before reaching into his pocket.

“Still got that temper on ya, huh?” he says, pulling out his wallet, “Honestly, you really need to work on your people skills, Taiga.”

“$45.65. Will that be cash or card?” I repeat, trying to hurry this along,

“Chill out, Taigy. I’m just trying to create conver-”

“Will that be cash or card?”

He snickers at my growing agitation, taking out his card and handing it to me, saying,

“Wow, someone’s extra cranky today, huh? Is that it? Is little gay baby Taigy cranky?”

Don’t get fired. Don’t get fired. Don’t get fired. Don’t get fired. Do not get fired. I take the card out of his hand and scan it. Hm. Declined. Who’da thought?

“I’m sorry, sir,” I say through the most convincing smile I can conjure up right now, “This card declined.”

His smug demeanor takes a noticeable shift. At least I can take solace in his embarrassment. He gives a smug scoff before reaching into his wallet again and pulling out another card. I take it and scan it.

“Declined,” I say, handing him the cards back, “Would you like to pay in cash?”

Admittedly, I’m starting to enjoy myself a bit. At least I don’t have to hear his stupid “jokes” anymore. Plus, the sight of him slightly panicking because he’s a big strong man who’s at risk of looking like a broke boy in front of someone he was just making fun of is just hilarious. It’s always a beautiful thing when the universe comes in clutch.

“No, no,” he says, “Just give me a second.”

He types away at his phone, probably just making it seem he’s settling things with his bank. Now I just wish there was a sea of people behind him just so he can suffer in the anxiety of being rushed. But you can’t have everything, I guess. A guy can dream, though.

“Ok, here,” he says, handing me the initial card.

I scan it and once again, it declines. I give him a smug look, saying in my most patronizing tone,

“I’m sorry, sir. It still declined. Would you like to try cash now?”

He grimaces before returning to his phone, aggressively tapping on it before bringing it to his ear. Uh oh. Someone’s gonna get a piece of his mind. Hopefully, he’ll be generous with himself. He doesn’t have that much to give. He turns away from me, whispering in the phone,

“Hey, I’m gonna need you to send like $50.”

“Just $50?” I hear his dad question through the phone,

“Yeah.”

“Now?”

“No, five years after I starve. Yes now.”

“No need to be aggressive. I’m just making sure. You seemed so sure you had enough. You want me to go in there?”

“No, I just need you to send the money!

“Well, what could you possibly be buying for that much anyway?”

“It doesn’t matter. I just have a bit less than I thought is all.”

“Well, it matters to me. $50 is a lot of money to just be sending out on a whim.”

“Like I said, it doesn’t matter. Just send it.

“Ok, ok. This is just a bit bizarre is all I’m saying…Aaaand sent. There you go.”

“Thank you. Jeez.”

“Also, side note, a “please” would’ve been much appreciated. Just something to take for the future.”

Ok, bye.”

“Oh, well, bye. I lo-”

He hangs up the phone, composing himself before saying,

“Ok, everything should be in order.”

I roll my eyes before swiping his card again. Sure enough, the payment goes through this time. Thank God. I place the card down on the conveyor belt along with the printed out receipt.

“There you go, have a nice day,” I say, forcing a smile,

“That’s it?” he questions in a sarcastic tone, “Come on, Taigy, where’s your hospitality? Can’t I at least get a ‘Goodbye’?”

“Sir, the transaction is complete. I now ask that you exit the premises unless you would like to make another purchase.”

“You’re so mean. What about a kiss?”

“Sir, I don’t take kindly to being harassed. Now, please leave or I will contact security to escort you out of here. And neither of us wants that.”

“Oh, now, you don’t have to go through such lengths, Taigy. Look, why don’t we just hang out after your shift like we used to?