I’m Gonna Kill Her

I’m Gonna Kill Her

by gonetopot

“Billy. Hey, Billy, you home?”

“Don’t come in here Jack. Just stay outside, please.”

Please? Billy never says please. That was Tom, whispering. Three of us stood on Billy’s porch, not sure what to do. We could hear Billy muttering something but it made no sense.

-CRASH-

Man, you can’t ignore a crash. Billy is our friend. So in the three of us went.

Oh shit. Don’t laugh, don’t laugh, oh god …. and all three of us were on the floor, gasping for breath, unable to stop shrieking with laughter.

Billy lay there, not making a sound. We finally pulled ourselves together.

“Sorry Billy, really sorry man, it just caught us off guard. You know we love you man. Oh god” and off we went again.

We finally calmed down enough to untie Billy from the chair. That must have been the crash, the chair tipping over. But Billy, our bud, oh man. Billy just lay there, glaring at us, not making a sound.

“Billy, who did this to you? It’s really bad man. We’ll help you kick their ass, we swear man. Whoever did this is evil.”

And we all really meant it, even if Billy didn’t believe us because it might be hard to take us serious when we couldn’t stop snickering while we said it.

Billy had no hair. I mean none, not a bit. We could see hair all over the floor but none of it was on Billy any more. And we had to stop looking at him because every time one of us did it ruined any attempt to take it seriously, because Billy’s balls were purple, I mean bright purple but that wasn’t what we couldn’t keep our eye off of. Billy’s cock looked like a barber pole, red and white stripes from the base to the tip and the tip was bright red and his cock was all stiff because of some ring at the base of it and…..off we went again.

Finally, we couldn’t laugh any more and Billy just lay there, not saying anything but it sounded like he was whispering and so we stopped making noise and listened real close.

“I’m gonna kill those bitches. I’m gonna find her and her sister and cut them up in little pieces and kill them.”

Oh crap, Nadine and her sister Cheryl. They were at it again. I almost wish Billy had taken our advice and left town after the divorce. For almost a year now Billy and Nadine had been at war. She keyed his truck, he put rotten fish in her car and house. She broke his windows, he poured thirty gallons of sewage in her bedroom, and on it went. But until now they had never touched each other. Oh man, this was really bad. Billy could be seriously mean if he wanted to. We all remembered when Nadine’s drunk daddy went after Billy when they were in the eighth grade. He was a big man, and a mean drunk. He must have outweighed Billy by fifty pounds. Billy took a hunk of 2×4 and broke his knee. He told him if he ever beat Nadine again he’d rip out his tongue. Nadine’s daddy left town when he got out of the hospital. Nobody ever messed with Billy again and Nadine was in love.

Billy is a good mechanic, like his dad and uncle, and after they graduated from high school Billy married Nadine and went to work.