Homecoming

By Samantha G.


At different times in our hurried lives, certain events will happen and shape who we are, as well as what we do. These events help to prepare us for the road ahead, and hopefully a more defined goal. These events can also cut us free from ancient ghosts that haunt us.




Ah, the roaring nineties. George Bush was president, and preparing for war. Saddam Hussein invaded Kuwait. Gas was one dollar and sixteen cents a gallon. And Janet Jackson’s “Rhythm Nation,” was headed to all kinds of Grammy’s, although I personally thought Alannah Myles song, “Black Velvet,” should have received more awards. Kevin Costner made me proud to be half Indian when “Dances with wolves,” hit the silver screens nation-wide. Dear God, I wanted to be Mary McDonald in that movie.

I should have been,” Stands with a fist!” I had a nicer butt and longer, blacker hair, so why not me? Maybe I was too much Indian. But, I also had my Mom’s beautiful Asian looks too. No good, I could never have passed for the part in that movie. I was a totally wrong race. So I went about the task of packing my car for the trip home, but Costner’s ass was now on my mind.

Now there’s a nice butt. That scene where John Dunbar is naked, with his back to the camera when he discovers, the warrior “Two Bears” is nearby. All Kevin had on were his cavalry boots, and nothing else. I held my breath waiting for him to turn towards the cameras in that part of the movie. I wanted to see it. Turn around John Dunbar, turn around, please? Nope, not a chance, Sammie. And the tease scene before this one, what a let down.

No! Don’t dive into that pond! Shit, now it’s going to shrink from the cold water. Nice going Costner, you big tease. And that last shot of his nearly perfect ass cheeks as he dove deep in the pond. Ah, nice butt, thank you. Us women get cheated at the movies every time. I stopped stuffing my car, and started to relive “The Great Penis Debate.”

“You know, the men have it made!” I yelled as I began a debate about fairness in cinema. I remember arguing with a guy in one of my arts classes about it.

“Shit, nine times out of ten, in almost every ‘R’ rated movie that I can remember, the guys always got to see a pretty woman’s ass, and tits, and even some pussy! And what did the women get to visually feast on? Nothing. Zip, zero, nadda!” I remember looking my opponent in this debate, Right Square in the eye.

“I, as a woman, do want to see a nice big penis on that screen.” I proudly declared. Now I put my finger in his stunned face. The females in attendance sat up, some with their mouths hanging open and others had eyes wide with suspense.

“Yeah, that’s right buddy.” I exclaimed as I put my hands on my hips. “I’d like to see all the men in the theatre squirm in their seats, for a change, as they sit next to their dates when the naked actor turns to the camera, and a ten inch dick swings into view.” I sat back down in my chair, victorious again! The girls in the class quickly stood and applauded. My opponents face couldn’t get any more flushed or sweaty. Thank God I had an instructor that allowed such verbiage. I owe it all to you, Professor Barnes.

I better concentrate on driving. I was leaving the UCLA campus for the summer. All year long, my life was contained inside a big box. To the north was Sunset Blvd, and to the south was LeConte. If I went west I hit Gayley Avenue and now that I was headed east, Hilgard would be my target, and then the interstate. I had worked my tail off for another semester, and loaded up on classes, some were really difficult but I kept a 3.75 GPA. Not bad considering I also ran track, and played on the women’s Lacrosse team. My social life was virtually nonexistent, so I was more than ready to let my hair down and bark at the moon.

The sun was shining high and bright in the early afternoon sky, as I traveled out of L.A. I also had trouble looking out my rear-view mirror since I had my car stuffed full with remnants from the long school year. I had books and boxes jammed full of now useless items. And of course, dirty laundry. Who the Hell wants to do the wash after that last class? It certainly wasn’t me. The clothes wouldn’t get any dirtier by just by lying there on my way home to Phoenix. I now had two whole weeks of nothing to do, before another summer working at Hooters, which I was looking forward to. Last summer I averaged two hundred a night in tips, plus rubbed elbows with some of my heroes from the Suns basketball team.

My music and Kevin Costner’s ass would keep me occupied from L.A. to San Diego. Then it was a quick fill up, followed by a late supper at Jack in the Box, and then I was off to points east and my summer vacation.

I let my beautiful 67 Mustang breathe the cool fast air down the interstate. I just love to glance down at a speedometer that reads at 130mph. The only human voice the desert heard that night was mine, singing praises to Kevin’s sweet lovely cheeks, and my own independence. I reveled in freedom on the road. I was flying through the desert night. Just me, the car, and a thousand million stars swaying in the black velvet sky.

If it weren’t for some loose gravel near the side of the highway, I would have never woken up.

Jesus! The sound of gravel hitting the bottom of the car woke me up, and I jerked the car back onto the highway. How did that happen? I only closed my eyes to rest them for a second. I didn’t realize just how tired I was, and would battle fatigue now. I still had a long way to go. So, I tried different tapes in the stereo, and singing along with them, as it worked well for a little while, then I would think about the people behind the songs of my life, and start daydreaming again. I really missed my Jason. He was the only man I ever had sex with. I gave all of my life and love to him, but it wasn’t enough. I was having such a hard time accepting being alone.

Sammie, you tried, and it didn’t work out. I got reassurance from my exhausted conscience. Well, we really did try to stay together in a long distance love affair, with me going to school at UCLA, and he had to stay behind to keep the shop open. It was his living, and his business was booming. He even started to build racing motors, so he was set for life. I held his hand for two long years. I gave him confidence and belief that he could do anything he set his mind to. So it was written in stone, when he suggested, we should date other people, too. I cried for weeks after he broke up with me. I turned down hundreds of guys. I was faithful. Why can’t I be free of his memory?
I really hope you’re happy dear Jason. After we broke up, it took all of six months for me to get a Dear Jane letter, and from my best friend at home. Tammy always wrote to me at school, at least once a week, and called every weekend to say hi, or fill me in on the gossip around town. I don’t want to think about that day, anymore. Tammy and I were inseparable. We could never hurt one another, ever.

Lookout everybody, here comes Sam, and Tam! We were legends in high school. In our senior year on the night before our big homecoming game, we broke into the school maintenance garage and barrowed the yard marker machine. I had an inspiration for a new team logo. And with the help of a full moon, we added our touch of school spirit to the gridiron field. The grounds crew tried to remove our artwork before the game, but it was of little use. The heavy morning dew, followed by the heat of the sun, baked the wet white powder into each blade of grass.

Between the forty-yard lines we illustrated the side view of a large, erect penis and a scrotum hanging from it, with the infamous slogan ‘BLOW ME’ underneath it. That was not only a thing of beauty, but also brilliance, as anyone who laid eyes on the new school logo, would automatically think the boys were behind it. Afterall, who ever heard of chicks getting a blowjob? We even had enough white powder left over in the bucket of the machine to give the happy penis, three squirts flying out of the tip.

A true work of art. It was the most talked about, and most photographed homecoming game in the history of the valley. Sam and Tam had left their mark in Arizona folklore. The Chandler ” Cock and Balls” won the game, 34-10. When we were twenty point underdogs. My buddy Tammy, how I have missed you.

Why didn’t Tammy call me? Instead I got that fucking letter last year. I knew it wasn’t just to say hello Sammie, as it was full of folded pages. The day I read that letter was the second most terrible day in my life.

“Hi Sammie, I have bad news.” Tammy’s writing was jagged and hurried. “Jason got married yesterday in Vegas.” Her opening line in that letter said it all. Wow! I knew he was dating this girl from Phoenix after we called it quits, but it all made no sense to me. Why so fast, Jason? I never did read the rest of the letter. Why did I tear it up? Maybe there was other news, maybe good news that Jason wanted me to call him.
What if we wanted to get back together? God, how I hated last year. Oh well, there’s no sense on dwelling about the past, besides I cried enough over loosing him. The night my dog was hit on the interstate back home was far worse than this one. My thoughts became a slow motion movie of the dear things I’ve lost in my first twenty years of life. My heart remained chained and tortured to the first love I ever had.

There’s no way, I’m going to make it to Chandler tonight, no way. I had to pull over and get some rest. I saw some faint lights up ahead over the next long hill. My luck, it was a 24-hour gas station. I pulled up to the pumps and got out and stretched. 12:15, not all that late. I have to call Tammy, and see if I can crash there tonight. I gassed up and went inside to the back of the quick-mart to use the pay phone. The late night manager’s eyes lit up when I walked in. Poor guy, his excitement for the night probably consisted of a jackrabbit or two scampering down the driveway.

“Hey Tammy, guess who?” there was silence on the other end of the phone.

“Sammie!?” a surprised voice yelled back. My ear was ringing. But I had a huge smile now. The cashier even heard Tammy, and shook his head laughing.

“Sammie, where are you, are you done with school, are you still in L.A.?” Wow, she was really excited, and I was just plain exhausted. “Yep, I’m coming home.”

“Tam? Can I crash at your place?” I could hear some kind of a party going on in the background.

“Of course Sammie, where are you now?” I could tell Tammy and her husband were having a party; of course it was Friday night. The Lavato’s always partied on Friday nights.

‘I’m about forty minutes away. If it’s not too much trouble Tam, I can’t wait to see you.”

“We’ll keep the light on for you! I can’t wait to see you too, Love you!” and she hung up. I got a big cup of coffee and paid for the gas. Heading back into the night, I began to feel her voice in my ear, so quiet and so very seductive, just the way she was the night we sat at midfield, on the night before the homecoming game.

“Nice job Tam.” I raised my can of Bud to solute my fellow artist. We now sat in success of our mission’s completeness. The desert full moon was now at the halfway point in it’s journey to end another orbit. We sat and drank up most of the twelve-pack my boyfriend, bought for us. “That’s what’s great about having a boyfriend like Jason.” I told my drunk partner at midfield.” Hell, we’re only seventeen, and he’s twenty-three. He can buy us beer anytime!” We couldn’t help but admire our creativity on this football field.

“Awesome idea Sammie.” Tammy tapped my can of beer in congratulations and took a big gulp. I had to stare at her, admiring how the light of the moon made her hair look as though it had a golden glow to it. The grass at this time of the night was heavy with cold wet dew, and a little uncomfortable to be sitting on. Our butts were cold and wet, but we were drunk, so who the hell cares uh? It was spooky to be here all alone at this field, as the only company we had were a few crickets chirping and an occasional nighthawks cry for companionship. Out of nowhere, she leaned over against me and kissed my cheek. I turned to kiss her cheek but she hadn’t moved her head back and our lips met.

“I’ve been waiting for this,” Her voice was muffled as she opened her mouth against mine. Her hand dropped the can of beer it was holding and she held my mouth tighter against hers. I wasn’t shocked but only overwhelmed by the unexpected excitement, as my tongue entered her warm inviting lips. Her tiny squeals of delight gave me nothing but incentive to indulge of her pleasures. I placed my beverage on the ground and cupped her large breast, how good it felt to hold her. Her breasts were much larger than my own. They felt so sexually charged, and so firm and heavy. I had to go under her sweatshirt, and feel this naked wonder. Our hot tongues wrestled in a sensual competition, how small, soft and warm she was compared to Jason’s.

“Oh, Tam-“ I moaned as I felt her hand was in my crotch grasping and searching. My pussy begging to be naked for more. I released her firm round breast and quickly unsnapped my jeans and lay back on the cold wet grass as she knelt above me licking my bare tummy. Her soft hands began to slide my jeans down, as the cool damp air invaded my hot moist underwear. Her knees were right next to my shoulders, as I ran my hand between her perfect thighs, hypnotized by the moon’s spotlight on her beautiful curves. I needed to pull her jeans off. The heat from her groin was incredible.

“Yes Tammy,” I whispered, as I didn’t want to think about it, I just wanted her to do it. I held her long blond hair in my hands trying to get her to move lower and faster.