Pine Ridge Pincess

Part Two


The afternoon sun shone brightly on the Berghoff, its snow covered peak dazzlingly white against the clear blue sky.

The city was a bustling mass of people going about their business as a slim young woman in a tracksuit jogged along the sidewalk towards the royal palace.

She took the palace steps two at a time and went to enter the main gate.

“Halt!” the guard shouted.

“It’s ok I live here,” Mitzy shouted.

“ID?” he queried.

“Like, I’m Princess Mitzy ok?” she insisted.

“Princess Mitzy is not flat chested,” the guard insisted, “Go away!”

“Now don’t you take that tone with me!” Mitzy protested, “I got ID see,” and she pulled out her Asda Walmart loyalty card.

“Jessica May Blanchard from Pine Ridge Nebraska,” the guard read, “Its says nothing about Princess Mitzy Fucksalot.”

“No,” Mitzy agreed, “Like you don’t recognise me?”

“No,” the guard insisted.

“I guess its because I had my tits done,” Mitzy suggested, “Guy in Heidleburg did it for free as long as he could sell the old implants on Ebay.

“Really?” the guard replied in disbelief, “Now why would anyone do something that stupid?”

“Cause you can’t jog very fast with E cup sillicon wobbing around up front,” Mitzy insisted, “I wanna run marathons like English princesses do.”

“I see,” the guard replied wondering of the woman was in fact a slimmed down Mitzy after all, she certainly seemed stupid enough.

“Do you reckon like if Boris married Mitzy then if I’m Jessie I ain’t no Princess?” she asked.

“Absolutely,” the guard agreed.

“Gee, so like I can go home to Pine Ridge Nebraska?” she asked, “Maybe go school or get a regular job at the lumber company?”

“I have no idea,” the guard insisted.

“You look different,” Mitzy said thoughtfully, “You always used to have a boner when you let me in, you ok?”

A light illuminated in the guard’s brain, “Did you say you wanted to come in?”
he asked.

“Sure,” Mitzy replied.

“Then I’ll tell the Prince you have returned,” he agreed and saluted smartly.

Mitzy jogged across the courtyard as consternation raged indoors.

“This is an outrage!” the King snapped.

“Damn!” Amelia Boris’s third Mistress complained as it was her night to get laid.

“Throw her out,” the Queen cried, “She cannot swan off for six months and just return when she wants to.”

They all crowded round the front door parting briefly to allow the jogger in, King, Queen, Boris and the palace staff.

Mitzy wondered what was going on, “What’s going on?” she asked.

“Princess Mitzy is coming,” the King explained, “Mitzy Fucksalot!”

“Right, I call myself Jessie now I had my tits done,” Mitzy explained, “I only just got signed off as STD free so I come for some of my stuff.”

“You Mitzy?” the Queen demanded, “Good god girl you look almost human!”

“Mitzy?” Boris queried.

“I calls myself Jessie again now, I got VD at the ball and it scared me so I ain’t no pornstar no more,” she explained.

“But your tits, where are your tits?” he demanded.

“Had the sillicon took out,” she replied, “I don’t want to do no whoring no more.”

“But why?” Boris exclaimed missing the point.

“I done it for me,” Mitzy explained, “Folks just saw me as a pair of tits and a cunt well I guess I want them to see I’m just a regular woman with a few million dollars in the bank and more coming in in royalties, who wants her own guy and settle down to have kids.”

“How touching,” the Queen suggested, “Two million for a divorce take it or leave it.”

“Gee pastor Reilly back home in Pine Ridge said that I made a solemn promise to god and me and Boris was wedded for all time,” Mitzy confessed, “So I figured to ask Boris if he wanted to maybe come to the states and maybe have some kids with me?”

“What go to America?” the Queen queried.

“Sure, I could get him a green card and everything!” Mitzy offered, “Hell I even took classes in your weird lingo.”

“You did that for me?” Boris asked in disbelief.

“Sure, you’re my husband ain’t you?” Mitzy asked.

And Boris flung his arms around her and kissed her passionately, “I will learn to love you,” he said and he realised her tits no longer dug in his chest and without all the makeup she was really quite beautiful.