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I grew up in an overly religious conservative family. I was only allowed to watch certain shows, certain movies only listen to certain weird music. I had to go to church every sunday and never asked questions about any of the weird stuff ffrom my childhood like the restrictions until when the election happened. it was my first real vote and i wanted it to matter. I hated the jerk who was in office but my family and church supported him. so I started asking my family why we supported…that man. I’d ask questions and like always any questions I asked were shut down with “do as your told” and “respect your elders, child…”

Once I turned 18 I started really wanting to experience everything other girls my age and younger was. Just me and friends talking about sex resulted in me getting a three hour lecture from my mother, a screaming hour from my father and even spanked by him. Did I mention I was over 18? But I didn’t resist. I never did when i was spanked. My friends say the “cult” was making me submissive but i don’t know if that was all true it was partly the religion but also part me. Maybe, the cult was taking advantage and strengthening something that was already there. I was also timid and never liked to say no if asked for favors. I don’t know because honestlyi never got to have a mind of my own.

The urge to move was already there for a few months and lucky for me I have great friends who all have been super supportive. I finally moved out when I was supposed to go to prom a few months ago. Everything was set up i was looking for a date a month before and that’s when my parents told me I couldn’t go and that was that…I screamed and told them they couldn’t do this. My mother then said the old phrase “you live under our roof” and that was it. I went into my room and packed the few things that were mine. Unfortunately at this point, it was almost midnight and I didn’t wanna wake and bother any of my friends so I grabbed my bookbag and my gym bag full of my clothes and walked out to the living room.