Snow College, the community college where I briefly attended, had many prohibitions against basic man-whoring activities. The institution itself is highly influenced by the doctrine of the Mormon Church, as many of the students who attend there, along with their professors, are de facto members of the hokey religion. Class study about the Book of Mormon and church history courses are readily available through the on-grounds LDS Institute and much of the conduct code of the college mirrors that of Brigham Young University. Because Snow College maintains an inextricable relationship to the Mormon Church, the standards of the LDS faith are strictly enforced within the residential living units on campus. Specifically, this meant that females were prohibited from spending the night within any male dormitory resident’s room. The dormitory complex where I stayed was no exception.

The Resident Assistant within my dormitory was a cookie-cutter Mormon missionary fuck who actively patrolled the hallways of my living unit at night. Bearing close similarity to the cock-blocking attitude of Mongobear, the RA would announce when it was time for all females to leave the dormitory each night and then make his rounds to each room, searching for stragglers. Without warning, the Resident Assistant had the power and authority to key open any dorm room that he was suspicious of harboring a female guest after hours. These random checks could come at any hour of the night and, if a female was found inside a resident’s bedroom, a fifty-dollar surcharge was fined to their student account, much like the bullshit that I went through while living with Bobby Boop and his deformed wife. When these room checks occurred, there was no verbal warning given, no announcement provided, and certainly no preceding knock before opening one’s bedroom door.

To help avoid the possibility of my naked fun being discovered by the Resident Assistant, I usually sneaked Brandy in through my dorm room window when she drove down from Salt Lake City to visit me. Fortunately, I lived on the ground level of the complex, which provided easy access to my room from the outside. All that was required was the removal of my window screen, which took place approximately twenty minutes after my arrival to campus. With a convenient entryway into my dorm room provided, Brandy frequented my domicile at all hours of the night.