One day I was really depressed because my girlfriend would not sleep with me because she said I had a small PP. I had run out of patience with that greedy ass bitch so I decided to commit suicide to teach her ass a lesson once and for all.

I went to the tallest building I had ever seen before in my life. It was my library, and it was about six stories tall. The elevator was out of order so I had to climb all of these fucking stairs and shit. When I finally got to the ledge I pulled my pants off and began to scream to the people down below that I was going to jump. They were so small like tiny ants.

After a little while, I think maybe about 9 hours, a rescue truck showed up. Two men got out and I could see them pointng and laughing at me. So I began to masturbate, so that after I hit the ground I would have a big PP and my girlfriend would know that she just made the biggest mistake of her life.

As I neared climax I went ahead and jumped off.